What I've Written About

Thursday, September 2, 2010

The Closet Dilemma

One of the prompts for writer's workshop this week was..."Tell us about a childhood fear you have taken into adulthood."

At first, I wanted to be all BRAVE and act like I have no fears, but that wouldn't be true. I'm afraid of lots of things.

HornetsSpidersDust MitesBed Bugs
LiceHaving my skirt tucked into my undies
Swearing in front of people I shouldn't swear in front of
Running into an EX-BoyfriendHaving to admit I'm wrong
Falling off a cliffSushiBoogers on little kids fingers...
You get the idea.

HOWEVER. There is one thing I've never admitted before that is completely true.

I still feel like there are monsters in my closet.
I can not sleep with my closet door open. It freaks me out. BIG TIME. Every time I have ever neglected to close it, I wake up in the middle of the night and feel like someone or something is watching from that darker spot in the corner of my room. Several times, I have believed it so much and have been so certain of it, I have to roll out of my bed and crawl (commando-style) over to flip on the light. As soon as the light is on, the thing standing in the open doorway disappears, but it still makes me have a cardiac arrest.

The problem with this is that my husband isn't bothered by the closet--as any rational adult would be--and so he always leaves it open a crack. He'll get up to put something away in his side and leave the door open. I don't dare tell him to close it because I'm scared out of my mind that a boogeyman is going to get me, so I always have to invent some excuse for getting up and then discreetly closing the door. I think he's getting suspicious, but he never says anything.

Now don't get me wrong. I don't believe in ghosts. I DON'T. When it comes to those kinds of things, I always just say "I choose not to believe."

But I swear. I have a boogeyman in my closet.

And it's making me feel like a hypocrit when I tell my kids that there is nothing in the dark that isn't there in the daylight.
And I hate that some nights I still have to hide under the covers.
And I want to pretend like I'm all courageous and tough.

When really. I'm still just a little kid. Afraid of monsters in my closet.

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Kristina P. said...

That's funny! I don't usually get scared of things like that. Mine are more stuff like having someone close die to me and things of that nature.

Bethany@ImperfectMom said...

I totally understand your fear! I don't think so much about monster's in the closet, but I hate to walk into a dark room-it creeps me out.
Visiting from Mama Kat's!

Anonymous said...

Dude... I opened your link at that photo alone sent chills through me! I too am one that has to keep the closet doors closed. and of course the hubs does not understand. lol

Angela M. said...

Oh, I'm not alone! I have a weird thing about the closet door, too. It either has to be wide open so I can see anything that may be in it or completely shut so I can't see anything coming for me. Never could figure out where this weird creepy fear comes from.

NaTahsha Ford said...

OK. I'm home alone, and that creepy picture shows up on you're blog. Thanks a ton! When I'm freaked out from the closet tonight, I might just give you a 1 a.m. text and making you come over. It's your fault after all. We all know that I'm NEVER afraid of things like that. 8)

Laura Marcella said...

I'M THE SAME WAY!!! I can not have closet doors open at night. My husband thinks it's silly. I don't like dark windows either. As soon as I need to turn on lights at night, I have to shut the blinds and curtains. I don't like the idea that someone could be standing right in front of my dark window and I wouldn't even know it because of the lights. *shudders*

You're not the only one with the closet fear, lol!

Jo Schaffer said...

HAHAAH! I'm with you on Spiders.
Ugh! And the only thing I fear in my closet is the mess and dirty laundry piling up!